So about the title....
I am on my way home, you know the 25 minute drive that I absolutely dread every morning and night? Anyway, when I have to work late or stay in Wentzville past 6pm or so, I rarely pass a car on some of these back roads. I have never paid attention to the posted speed limits. I am very careful and slow down for the curves and such but can you believe that there was a police officer hiding on one of the dark driveways and he pulled me over??? First of all, it scared me becauase I wasn't even sure it was a cop, second of all...surely he can find more business on a busier road somewhere! Anyway, I am cursing at myself as he comes up to the car...oh one important note... I had no idea where to pull over at. I mean there aren't any sides to these country roads, it just drops off in a ditch! I have been pulled over and been given my share of tickets but it's always been on the interstate! So I turn on my blinker and slow down but continue driving looking for a safe place to pull over. The police officer pulls right up on my bumper and shines his spot light and turns on his sirens. I stopped..he gets out and starts lecturing me about how I need to pull over right away or they could assume I was hiding drugs or a gun. ARE YOU SERIOUS??? LOL Anyway, I was very nice to him and he didn't give me a ticket. WHEW! I was going 44 in a 30. Do you know how slow 30 is when you are driving home after a 10 hour day and there are no other cars on the road?? Anyway...so after I drove off, or should I say crawled off... I was thinking, I should be grateful he pulled me over and I wasn't involved in an accident that took my own life or someone else's. It's all a matter of perspective.
And so is the beauty of the dark skies out here in the middle of no where! I have to walk about 100 yards to the mail box and to get the trash can. I usually leave the mail and get it in the mornings but tonight I had to get the trash can from the corner of the road. It's dark out there...and my first thought was "this is NOT safe". LOL As if there is anyone else out here??? Then as I was walking and realized how nice and peaceful it was, I looked up into the sky and saw the constellations and thought.... It's all a matter of perspective.
Not sure why that phrase has been coming up so much. I guess it's true though - we can choose to see things in a negative way or a positive way, it's up to us to decide. That is also how I am looking at this situation with "J" and the new baby and Brooke. We went to the doctor today and up until this appointment, I think I was keeping my guard up. Not sure I was ready to do this again. Not sure the baby was okay. Not trusting "J" to be making good and healthy decisions for herself and the baby. Today the doctor couldn't find the baby's heartbeat so they decided to look for it on the ultra-sound. I GOT TO SEE MY BABY FOR THE FIRST TIME! It was the coolest thing ever to see the head and the doctor pointed out the heartbeat. My heart melted, my eyes teared up and I think I fell in love with that little alien looking thing! Couldn't see much else at this point but what I did see was enough to take my breath away. We go back to the doctor on February 18 for the ultra-sound that will be more thorough and will be able to give us a better due date and hopefully the gender of the baby. I can't wait!
The matter of perspective phrase applies to the situation with Brooke as well. I don't know what's going to happen. I can choose to be frustrated with the whole thing or I can choose to "Let Go and Let God". I can surrender the power to Him and trust that He is leading us down the path that He has chosen and in the mean time, I CHOOSE to just enjoy this little girl who has brought so much happiness to my life. Every day I am blessed that she is in my life and calls me mommy. I just want to enjoy every second of it and not miss a moment of happiness with her worrying about what tomorrow might bring.
How can I not smile and enjoy every day of my life with this goofy little angel in it?
2 comments:
hmmm I cannot believe you were speeding....nevermind on a country road. Tell me it's not true!!!
Well "anonymous"... I can't believe I was either! That police officer should probably check his radar gun for malfunction. I'd never break the law!
Post a Comment